Thursday, July 23, 2009

What I have found about Christian women being sexy.....

and my own opinion on what I have found.

I did a google search on christian women desiring to be sexy. Not very much out there. I did find a FABULOUS sight. I think it was christiannympho.com. Very, very awesome.

That aside. The majority of sites addressing these issues were made for teens. Apparently only teenage girls have a desire to feel sexy. I like to believe that only teenage girls are honest about wanting to feel sexy.


Another thing I learned is that there are so many facets to this line of questioning. This is a major - sitting by the fire discussing for hours - type of topic.

Anywho, back to the tpic. So the main theme of the sites I found is that dressing sexy is ok - as long as it is strictly for your husband and done in the privacy of your home. That by dressing sexy outside of your home you are tempting your brother to fall, which is directly against God, according to these website's take on biblical text.

Wow....did my hackles raise on that one. My feminist sesibilities were appalled! Then I calmed down and remember to pray. Ummm hello?? Isn't that the most important thing I've learned? It's truely best to go to God and lay it all out. Asking him to imprint on me and to have the Holy Spirit convict me of what is right for me. That is truely the only way to know what God intended for me. I needed the Holy Spirit to guide my thoughts and feelings as I was preparing to take in new information.

So....my next step was to find said bible verse about causing a brother to stumble. I wanted the verse only so that I could look it up in my own bible. I found it.

Romans 14:13.

Here is what my bible said.

"Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way."

Wow. The first part of that I love. In my circle of friends - well, I'll be honest. In the majority of Christians, judgment is thick. It's not specifically stated, but more implied. Or maybe I'm just paranoid and it's not there at all! But regardless I've felt it. Judgment based on lower class. Judgements of rednecks and hillbillies. Judgment of Yuppies and Richies....Judgement on people "living in sin", judgment on those who just live life a little differently.

The first part also dealt with a topic I touched on in my last post. That I changed myself because of the way my new circle of friends viewed me and my "mom" status. Ummmmm...right there it states to stop passing judgment. When this verse is quoted, by both web sites and people I know in real life, that first part is always skipped over. Convenient.

So then I look at the last part. Do not put any stumbling block in your brothers way. I like that. I took it as - do not intentionally go to your brother and try to make him fail. Don't set up your friends for failure.

Side note: the majority of bosses I've worked for could learn from that verse right there.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch:

Here is the part I don't like and havn't been convicted to believe otherwise. Adults are adults. They are VERY capable of making decisions. Good and Bad. So I look at it as if I dress sexy, or post sexy pictures, it is up to the other adults reading my blog to decide if they want to look. I'll be honest, I want people to look. Men and women. I like attention. I prefer only positive ones who look to build my self esteem by commenting. But I will take the good with the bad.

But I was still not sure. Am I making my brother stumble? I mean, adults are adults. But I don't want to go against God. So I decided to read the entire chapter that brought forth said verse to clarify my confusion. I suggest all should read this personally, from their own bible so that when they comment on my post I am certain we have all read the same thing. If you don't own a bible, please let me know and I will mail you one.

I'm going to state my own interpretation. It talks about not judging A LOT. It uses the example of religions who allow foods and those that don't. Who is right, who is wrong. But in verse 5 it states that

"Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind."

That's that Holy Spirit conviction I was talking about.

It also goes on to say if one persons does something and views it as special, so does the lord. If someone else does something similar and views it as special, so does the Lord.

To me that means that even though you did something different, both area special to the Lord. It doesn't make either thing MORE special. It also goes on to say that we are each personally accountable to the Lord. So don't worry about what your brother does, they will deal with it one on one with God.

Verse 15 - and I'm saying this in my own words - please read it for your self -

Says that if your friend is upset because of what you do, you are not acting in love. Don't let what you do destroy your friend.

Ergo another conflict for me. I say that what I do shouldn't upset my friends. That because of their love for me they won't be upset, but happy for me. I'll be the first to admit that my line of thought is selfish. But how I feel nontheless.

Then it starts talking about food again. Which irritates me. I start thinking. Are you kidding me? How am I supposed to take this? Am I supposed to substitute HNT pictures for the word food? Is that what God intended for me to do?

Or was this written, for all intents and purposes, to address food? GRRRRRRRRRR.... That will be one thing that God will explain to me in Heaven, I'm sure. It's on both of our "to be clarified" lists.

So, ergo, I pray again for Holy Spirit conviction. But I'm not getting any convicting vibes. I rest on the last part of the last verse.

Verse 22

"...because eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin."

So as long as I am fully convinced that those HNT pics are not wrong, then I am acting in faith, and I am all good.

Ergo - after prayer and turning to my bible and God I am ok with it. There is no guilt in taking those pics. There is no guilt in sharing those pics. I am not doing it with the intention of causing a brother to stumble, but with the intention of building up my self esteem and sex life. Issues which I have prayed that God provide a way to make them better. And it seems He has.

Amen.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

OK.

You know me. You know how I am, and you know my beliefs...or lack there of.

I have had a lot of rough spots in my life. I have had a lot of great things happen to me in my life. But through EVERYTHING, I have lived my life by 1 thing...

BE TRUE TO MY HEART.

I am me, and you are you. You have your beliefs, and I don't fault you for that. But at what point do you live your life for YOU?

I know you want to be a good Christian woman. But I know plenty of good Christians, that still live their lives the way that make them happy, and damn the haters. Ya know?

What you do in your life, should only be judged by you, your husband, and your God. No one else needs to know that you have done, or will do, HNT pics. That you want the things you want sexually, or anything else.

I love you, and your husband no matter what. You guys make me smile everytime I see you, which doesn't seem to be enough by the way. But the last 2 times I have seen you guys, you both don't seem the same as the few times before. You guys seem to be holding a little back. Like you are worried about something.

BE YOU AND YOU ALONE!!! If being sexy is what you want, BE SEXY DAMN IT! If being conservative (sp?) is what you want, go for it. But either way, I am missing the other blogs, and the HNT pics. as I am sure a lot of other people are as well.

LOVE!
Wicked

Unknown said...

Well, I have spent the last few days considering how I was going to respond to this and how I was going to express myself well.

First off, I will have to say that I do not have a full understanding of what HNT pics are. I have an idea, but I don't think that we have fully discussed what it entails. That being said, I am going to comment more on the need to do them more than the pics themselves.

I think that placing all Christian women in this pretty little package is wrong. Anyone who assumes that all Christian women are judgemental and close-minded has a few things to learn about women such as myself. I find myself at a point in my life where I am stronger in my faith than I ever have been and am also more comfortable with who I am at the same time. I love to feel sexy, I love to look good, I love to have a great glass of wine, I love to have a great sex life, I love to express myself freely. That doesn't make me any less Christian than the next person you see. I am saying all of this to tell you that you have to be comfortable with who you are or you will never be comfortable in your Christian life. You will always feel like you are trying to live up to human standards. Humans are not who we are trying to emulate, so don't compare yourself to others' lives.

More on the next comment....

Unknown said...

My only piece of constructive criticism is this:

We had a month-long series on a healthy sex life inside of our marriages and one of the things that we talked about was not NEEDING other things to make our sex life fulfilling. So my question to you is, do you NEED other people to view pictures of you to make your sex life better? Is it an "addiction"(of sorts) or are you okay without it?

While I think that you are free to take these pictures if you want to, I ask you to take a different look at this situation and see if it is a NEED or a WANT.

Good luck with your search and discovery while on this path!

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