Another Big Fat Slap in the Face...

Wow....I am having a crappy week. I'm still dealing with major Drama from my sisters divorce. Being sucked in to the horrible high schoolish void has brought things to light that are very hurtful to me and I am trying to shove those feelings back into a dark corner in the back of my mind where I don't have to address them.

On top of that I found out today that the appraisal for our property didn't come in high enough for us to do what we want. We are still awaiting the actual appraisal so we don't know specifically why...but it was a crushing blow non the less.

I am feeling very emotional and angry today. I have held on to faith for so long. I have been the one to tell DH that he must have faith!! The Lord knows what we need. The Lord will provide...yadda yadda yadda yackity smackity.

I'm starting to believe that this is the best I'm gonna get. This is it. Because of choices that I made earlier in life - this is what I get.

I guess it's not that bad. A roof over my head. My belly is full. My kids are healthy and clothed. I'm just being selfish by asking for more.

I honestly try not to ask for much. I don't mind if I don't get anything for myself. I don't look for birthday or christmas presents.

But a secret small little place inside of me is begging. Please. Please. Please. Just let me have something really nice. A house of my own. A place that isn't over run by clutter and has complete floors, and no broken windows, and no drywall that needs replaced. Enough drawers in the kitchen for towels and utensils and silverwear. And a place for an effing dining room table. I would LOVE to have a table we could sit at and eat dinner together.

Sigh. Big Fat Sigh.

So we now have a new game plan. We are going to rent a pod thingie and move things out and re do rooms here. Eliminate clutter. Replace flooring. Replace drywall. Fix electrical outlets.

And live here. In this single wide trailer I HATE with a passion. For another 5 years. With DH being in a perpetual depression because he feels like he is working for nothing.

I will try to post pics of the work we are doing. To remind myself of how it used to look and how far we make it go. Maybe in 20 years, when we finnaly get our dream house, we will look back and say - wow - look how far we've come.

A visit from your neighborhood appraiser

Ok, so as part of the home building process we have to have our property appraised. See what value of our property plus the new home equals what we need to borrow.

So on Monday I spoke to the appraiser. A very nice lady who told me that she was going to try to come out on Tuesday, but it would probably be Wednesday. I said no problem, if I leave on Wednesday, I will make sure my dogs are in the house.

That quickly, it went out of my mind. So Tuesday morning, I'm sitting at my computer, with my front door open, in my pajamas drinking some tea. My children were outside in their underwear.

Please note: my children playing in their underwear is an every day thing. They are both young, and we live in the middle of the woods. No one can see them but me, and I see them naked. So in their mind, underwear is equal to clothes.

Now that you have this visual......as I am sipping my tea I hear my dogs starting to bark. I sit up straight as I realize what they are barking about. I run to the door and yell to my kids to come in. I'm frantically waving my arms yelling for them to come in. My daughter keeps giving me a very quizzical look and saying "Why?". I said that we had company company and they were in their underwear. She said "So what?"

Before I could walk out and beat correct her, in pulls the appraiser. So I apologize to her about the state of my children and their undress. She laughs and says no problem.

She gets her stuff out and goes about her business, then yells a question to me. "Are you guys selling part of this off?"

At first I didn't know what she was talking about. Then I remembered...in my front yard DH had done some dozer work so it was all tilled up. Then, while I was grocery shopping, he took one of my real estate signs (remember, I used to practice real estate and am still a licensed realtor)and set the sign up in the tilled dirt.

Now, I'm sure you are thinking....why would he do that? What logical reason could he have for putting a realtor sign in their yard? No one can see it? We would never think of selling.

He put the sign in the yard TO SHOOT IT. He bought a new gun. He didn't have any targets to shoot at, so he took my sign out of the shed, put it into the ground, and shot it up.

As I explained this to the appraiser, I know she could hear banjo's in her head.

Wait, it gets better.

She continues doing her job....then starts kinda hopping over to me. I look down at her foot to see what happened.....yep, big pile of dog poopie.

She was wearing sandels.

I offer to turn on the hose for her, but that wasn't good enough. She needed to come in and wash it off.

Did I mention I hadn't done the breakfast dishes? Or picked up my kids after breakfast mess? Hadn't swept my kitchen floor? Needed to take the trash out??

Yeah, I'm curious to see what our places appraiser for now, LOL.

Have you been swimming?

Ok, so got our well repaired last week. It’s only been broken for about 1 year or so. Some idiot guy that used to be our neighbor backed into it and said nothing but, "Hey, I just busted your well."

But hey, it still pumped water in, so we just kinda lived with it. We called the well people, but they were booked solid for several months, so we got on a waiting list. Apparently Christmas is a slow time for well people because they very nicely came out and fixed our well.

What I didn’t realize when I got home was that not only did they fix it, but they treated it as well. For those of you that aren't familiar with the highly technical aspects of well treating it goes kinda like this:

Open 7-10 jugs of Chlorine Bleach
Open top of well
Dump all jugs of Chorine into well
Close top of well

It is the homeowners responsiblity to then run the water out of all of the faucets in the house for a good 1/2 hour to an hour.

But remember, I didn't know that they treated the well.

So I come home from work, and make my daily pitcher of kool aid for my heathens children. Suddenly, I start smelling Chlorine bleach. I’m standing at my sink, looking around my kitchen, wondering if DH had cleaned something with bleach (as if!!). I don't notice any white streaks on anything, or any spills on the floor. Hmmmm...

I start picking up my dishes to see if my dishwashing detergent has a hint of bleach in it. No, none of my dishes smell like bleach..hmmmm..

I look under my sink to see if my bleach has someone been opened by mice, or maybe cleaning fairies really exist!!

Nope, nothing to it under the sink either.

Damn...where is that smell coming from....oh well,I'll just add the sugar to the koolaid and start stirring...

That's when it hits me...OMG!!!! I could have killed my kids!!!

The bleach is coming from my faucets!!!! Jeeeessssuuuuusss H. Crimeny.......

So after I dump the kool aid out,(damn it, I just wasted precious sugar) I ask my DH if he had known about the well treatment.

No...is that what that bleach smell is??

Ummm Yeah.

So, I run the water for awhile, and promptly forget about it.

My daughter mentions that she wants a bath. Ok, cool. I run back, turn on the water, and then go about the house collecting dirty clothes to throw into the washer while the kids bathe...

"MOM....MOOOOMMMM...MY EYES ARE BURNING!!"

OMFG!! I FORGOT ABOUT RUNNING THE BATHROOM FAUCET. I run back to make sure my daughters face isn't dripping off the bones (in my mind bleach is a lot like acid). Here her face wasn't even wet, but the bleach in the air stung my eyes as I walked in.

So amidst angry tears at not getting a bath, I drain the bathwater...

Anyhow, it's over a week now, and while we are able to bath and drink as normal, there's still a "tinge" of bleach.

Which is why every day someone will ask me, "Have you been swimming?"