Finally DH realizes - sort of

Well last night DH said the words out loud that I've been thinking in my head for a looooong time.

I'M SELFISH.

He said this with no prompting from myself, and after several minutes of deep after sex thoughts.

Let me enumerate the ways he is selfish. I'll start with the lesser offenses.

1. He has 2 spaces in our living room that are HIS spaces. No one else may put their items in those spaces or said items will be thrown to floor, or possibly put in the trash. He will also bitch the ENTIRE time he takes said items out of his spaces. These spaces ALSO happen to be the most convenient spaces - the stand right beside the front door, and the end table right beside the "master" chair.

2. If there is ANY food, no matter if it is something I have saved from dinner for my lunch the following day, or a dessert I've been nibbling on - to him it is free game. He will eat it, and then act offended because I'm mad that it's gone.

3. He expects me to plan my life around whatever his work and/or play schedule is. If I want to do something and I don't want to take the children, he must have a minimum of a week's notice, and reminders several times a day, every day, until the date of my excursion. If my excursion isn't household related then I get a HUGE guilty trip, and the Spanish Inquisition as to when I will be home. If I am not at home at the time I indicated or earlier, I am given the whole - Well you said you'd be home at.....

4. When we have sex - oh wait, that's for my other blog. Just be rest assured that he can be selfish in that way too.

5. If he is watching TV, and I am doing something, like reading, or laundry, or cooking dinner he acts all pissed off if I ask him to get the kids something to eat or drink. Heaven forbid he pause the tv and let me continue with what I am doing.

6. The main selfish thing he has done lately is a biggie. He has decided that since I don't want to ride Harley as much any more, we needed another "family" hobby. So he has decided that we need a rat rod. Please feel free to google this to get more information.

See, about 2 months ago, we decided that we were done living in a tube. That we wanted to build a house. I said, if we can eliminate all debt, except the car payment and the mortgage payment, we can afford to build. We'll be sitting pretty good.

He agreed. So since the first of year I have been putting $207 dollars out of each of my paychecks into a Flexible Spending account for daycare. I don't have a seperate savings account outside of our joint checking. Whenever I bring up the subject of opening one up, he freaks out, claims I'm going to leave him. He doesn't like me being able to stash money that he can't touch, etc. In all fairness, I do have access to his savings, but I only touch it upon his request.

Anyhow, we decided to take the money saved in Flexible Spending since the first of the year, and pay off one credit card. Great. We were in agreement. We also decided to track our spending for one month, so that I could create a budget so that we could stop wasting money. He thinks I'm spending it all, I think he is, and vice versa. So I said we could track it, to find out where the leaks are.

So I pay off the credit card. Now this makes our checking account balance back down to paycheck to paycheck. We used to have some cushion in it, but now it's bare bones.

As of Friday we had appx. $350 dollars in our checking account. Now he has been saving money, and taking money from his dump truck jobs and stashing it away for this rat rod.

He was aware of our financial situation. He knew how much money we had in our account. I also knew that if we really needed it, the money from his savings would be there as a back up.

Out of that $350 had to come $175 for daycare, $70 for fuel and pop for a party, $40.00 for groceries $35.00 for pizza after church, $30.00 for offering. Leaving us at exactly $0.00. And we don't get paid for 5 more days.

But did that stop him? Nope, he went and bought that damn rat rod. And I have to take my kids over to my BFF's tonight, because he is going to pick it up, and start working on it.

Yippeee.

Selfish? His picture is in the dictionary for the definition.